Emma's Story
Mum-of-two and Business Analyst turned Private Investigator, Emma, 40, suspected her husband of having an affair with his Personal Assistant. She hired a Private Investigator to uncover the truth and believes it was the best financial decision she’s ever made and is now seeking to help others.
At the time, Emma was working full-time, writing a children’s novel, and had set-up a movement on the Sunshine Coast for women to make more friends called Create my Tribe. Her two children were in full time education and Day Care. She admits, “I’d thrown myself into my work so that we could buy our dream property on the Sunshine Coast, so looking back I guess he felt lonely”.
She believe’s things between her husband and his firms newest employee started out as an emotional affair and that her husband never intended for things to turn out the way they did. Once she’d discovered that he’d been spending time alone with this woman at his personal assistant’s home for hours on end, she packed up his belongings and confronted him. Emma says, “Once I’d thrown his belongings all over the other woman’s front lawn, he tried to stop me from leaving. He just kept repeating over and over - it’s not what it looks like. His denial was pretty text book.”
Statistics show that only 5% of married men go on to divorce their wives to start a relationship with their mistress. Emma confirmed whist some people can forgive their partners for cheating (be it physical or emotional) and in some cases go on to have an even better relationship than they did before, she wasn’t one of those people, but that she had respect for those who are.
“I’ll never forget the look of horror on his face - he’d been caught out on a lie”.
“I did something I never thought I’d do and messaged his personal assistant. I told her that I knew they were together and that she could have him. About five days later I received a response to my message stating that they were “work colleagues only” and that I needed to “get my head checked”. She even threatened me with legal action for harassment. I was utterly dumbfounded because I hadn’t done anything wrong from a legal standpoint; I’d sent two non-threatening and non-abusive messages. Things weren’t quite adding up.
I told my husband about the exchange of messages but oddly he didn’t seem surprised or angry. He simply continued to reassure me that nothing was going on, and that he loved me and our family.
But still, something didn’t feel quite right.”
Just one day after receiving the message from the other woman telling Emma that she needed to “get her head checked”, she caught her husband inside his personal assistants one-bedroom unit and ended their relationship on the spot.
“I felt like such a fool”, Emma said. “He had been gaslighting me this whole time and made me feel I was going crazy. I even considered booking myself into therapy at one point because his lies were just so convincing! There was one occasion where I offered my husband an amicable way out of our marriage over text message, as something was clearly wrong, but after a few hours he said he’d had second thoughts and asked for another chance. That’s what hurts the most. He had an opportunity to leave me, but he chose not to. Catching him with his personal assistant at her home removed any shadow of a doubt for me and was the evidence that I needed to confidently end our marriage.”
“In the weeks leading up to Emma catching her ex inside his personal assistants house, she’d built up quite the collection of red flags. The main red flags were:
- He would keep his phone with him at all times.
- He seemed distracted in conversation.
- He’d started taking a lot more pride in his appearance for work.
- He’d started to listen to new music.
- He’d disappear for hours on end on the weekends.
- He’d started going into the office early and returning home late from work more regularly. ”
Emma cast her memory back to when she was 14-years old. She recalled watching an American TV series called ‘Cheaters’. After some research she understood that she needed to engage the services of a Private Investigator, and not just ‘any’ Private Investigator, but one that held a PI licence in the state of Queensland.
Nervously, Emma reached out to a few different PI agencies on the Sunshine Coast and Brisbane, with some answering her enquiry straight away and others taking several days to respond to her, which to Emma felt like an eternity. Some PI’s explained that they weren’t available for a few months but she knew she couldn’t wait that long. She needed answers.
The one PI that stood out for her answered her call immediately. She described him as knowledgable and sympathetic and stated that he was able to put her mind at ease within just a few minutes. He confirmed that what Emma was experiencing was a classic case of cheating. The PI explained the process and walked her through what was legally possible, as well as the costs involved. She felt confident that she was going to uncover that her husband with in the arms of another woman but for the first time in her life, she wanted to be proven wrong.
“The Private Investigator agreed the day, start time and duration that he would undertake the surveillance of my husband. It was all straightforward and what’s more - legal.”
The day arrived and her husband said he was going to spend the day driving out and about on the Sunshine Coast. Again, this was another red flag as this was something that we’d normally do together as a family.
Her husband set off for the day with the Private Investigator in tow and within just 20 minutes the Private Investigator called her with the news that she’d been dreading. He explained that although he was about to give her some information, he’d only really be confirming what she already knew. He went on to confirm that her husband was at an address and had disappeared inside.
The actual video surveillance footage of what happened next will be released next month (October 2023), so watch this space!
Emma feels her story is one that has a happy ending and that something positive has come from a negative situation.
Hiring a Private Investigator meant that Emma was able to uncover her exes misdemeanour (words that her ex uses to describe the series of events) relatively quickly and remove any doubt from her mind.
18 months on and Emma has successfully qualified as a Licenced Private Investigator and now feels she is able to move on with her life and help others going through a similar situation. She also recently purchased her dream home on the Sunshine Coast and says “I can’t wait to see the looks on my children’s faces when they see it”!
Emma is still in touch with the Private Investigator that she hired and is forever grateful that he saved her from making the biggest mistake of her life. “I want to be clear - I do not regret marrying my ex, far from it. We share lots of happy memories together and have two amazing children as a result. What I regret is the way in which our marriage ended.”
Emma’s mission is to help her clients uncover the truth.